How To Break Up With A Friend (Without It Getting Messy)

It can be difficult to let a toxic friendship go. While it is essential to keep fighting for a friendship you care about, if a friendship starts negatively affecting your mental health, sometimes you have to part ways – even if it is just for a little while. The trickiest part, however, is knowing when and how to let go. In this article, we’ll get into all the ins and outs of how to break up with a friend properly without any additional stress. 


two girls friendship upset friendship break up fighting disconnected

Don’t Just blame the other person

It is important to acknowledge that you played a part too because realistically, you most likely did something to upset the other person at some point; we’re not always perfect.

If your friend feels like they are being blamed completely for the loss of the friendship, it will make it harder for them to accept the friendship’s termination and may cause them to resent you.

Make Sure You Really Want To Do It

Did your friend do something inexcusable or was it just a misunderstanding? It is important to be honest with yourself about what really happened. If there are any people outside the friendship that played a part, did they influence the situation?

Tip: Ask yourself whether this is something that can be forgiven and forgotten or just forgiven. Only you know the answer to this because everyone has different standards of friendship.


Don’t Send Mixed Messages

If you want the friendship to end, just say that — while delivering the message nicely. However, if taking a break sounds like the better option, don’t be afraid to say that you care about her and just need some time apart.

You don’t have to deliver the message in person; it’s alright to do it over text. As Elisabeth Anter writes for, it is alright to “send a polite, clear message that you do not want to be friends anymore” when dealing with abusive friendships.


Remember this isn’t the time to fight

Breaking up with a friend is not the time to start an argument or rehash things. You’ve made your decision and all you have to do is communicate how feel. However, if you want to talk it out before you part ways, make sure to listen to your friend’s side of the story.


When was the last time you ended a friendship and how did you do it? Let us know in the comments.


See also: 5 Ways to Rekindle an Old Friendship

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